Every election season in the Philippines, t-shirt printing inquiries sprout like mushrooms after rain. Why not? T-shirts are one of the most effective marketing tools, perfect for plastering the faces of politicians everywhere. But among the usual orders of a few thousand or maybe a million shirts, there’s always one wild unicorn of a request: "20 million t-shirts for one politician’s campaign."

Let’s break this down. Imagine earning ₱5 million in profit just by slapping a ₱0.25 markup on each shirt—instant millionaire status! The numbers are intoxicating, right? But before we get carried away with dreams of mansions and Teslas, let’s take a closer (and funnier) look at why this “jackpot” isn’t just unrealistic—it’s downright absurd.

The Math That Shatters the Dream

The world record for the fastest t-shirt printing by a single operator is 2,139 shirts per hour, set by the legendary Mr. Omar Viera. But let’s be real, even Mr. Viera isn’t a printing machine who can keep that pace up for 16 hours a day. Assuming a much more humane rate of 1,500 shirts per hour, here’s how the math plays out:

  • Per Day: At 16 hours of nonstop printing, you’d finish 24,000 shirts per day.
  • Per Month: After 30 days, that’s 720,000 shirts.
  • Three Months Later: You’re at 2.16 million shirts, but oops—the election is over, tapos na ang eleksyon nag piprint kpa din!

To hit 20 million shirts, you’d need over 2 years of continuous printing, assuming no machine breakdowns, no holidays, and no sleep. And if you’re targeting a “modest” 10 million shirts, you’re still looking at a solid year of work. By then, sure win na siguro sa barangay election. 

Logistics: The EDSA Nightmare

Let’s say you somehow manage to finish printing this mountain of shirts. Now comes the Herculean task of packing and delivering them.

Based on a rough estimate, a 20-foot container can fit 120,000 t-shirts under heavy compression. For 20 million shirts, you’d need at least 167 trucks. Can you imagine that convoy clogging up EDSA? It’s the kind of logistics headache that would make MMDA cry.

And where would you park these trucks while waiting for distribution? At this point, even Mr. Politician’s barangay gym might be converted into a massive t-shirt parking lot. 

Distribution: A Task Fit for an Army

Printing and delivering is one thing—distributing 20 million shirts is a whole other ballgame. To get these shirts into the hands of voters, Mr. Politician would need an army of 20,000 distributors, each tasked with handing out 1,000 shirts. Even if you managed to pull this off, good luck explaining why some people got 10 shirts while others got none. hahaha!

Supplies? Good Luck With That

Before any of this production starts, there’s the small matter of sourcing 20 million blank t-shirts. Let’s face it—kahit itaktak mo pa ang Divisoria, Taytay, and Baclaran at Nepa Q-mart Lol! , they still wouldn’t have enough stock to meet this demand. And China? Sure, they’re known for large-scale manufacturing, but even they would need months to fulfill such an order.

The Common Themes of These Inquiries

Now, let’s be honest. The people who inquire about these 20-million-shirt orders share some common quirks:

  1. Timing: They show up just weeks before the campaign period when everyone’s scrambling to finalize their strategy.
  2. Top-Secret Client: When asked who the shirts are for, they either say, “We can’t disclose,” or maybe they don’t even know themselves. 
  3. The Budget: Here’s the kicker—they want all of this done for ₱20 per shirt. Yes, as in BENTE! including printing, packing, and delivery. pwede ito sa manila paper.

The Reality Check

While the idea of printing 20 million shirts might seem like a dream come true, it’s clear that the logistics, time constraints, and absurd budgets make it nothing more than a fantasy. At Selestine Arts, we’ve seen and heard it all. So, the next time someone walks in with a proposal for a 20-million-shirt order, we’ll smile, nod, and politely decline—because we know that while dreams are free, reality isn’t.

And to all the t-shirt printers out there, let this be a reminder: not all "opportunities" are worth chasing. Sometimes, it’s better to focus on the realistic orders that keep your business running smoothly than to lose sleep over someone’s pipe dream. After all, we’re here to print, not to lose our minds (or our shirts).